Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The View From Heaven

     For months now I've been feeling off-kilter. I have been in need of something in my life. Balance? Relaxation? Brain transplant? Vacation!!! I thought long and hard about where we should go that we could bring children and they would have a good time while I still got to relax and  enjoy my journey back to sanity. Florida was just too much to conquer with a  baby  and we only had a few days so NJ (my  home state) was just too far to travel. I stumbled  on a website that made me instantly smile and after much  deliberation in my crowded mind, I booked a cabin in the Blue Ridge Mountains.
    Now, I am by no means a  full-fledged country girl being from New Jersey , but after eight years in Georgia I can get a little dirty  and not squeal. However, this  is not that camping trip. This is luxury camping for countrified city  girls. After persuading the kids  with a cabin that had  air hockey, foosball, and  pool tables as well as  arcade style video games in the basement everyone was on board. I planned  gem mining, apple picking, and train rides, but for the most part my plan was relaxation. Now, anyone that knows me, knows full well that my life is rarely relaxing. It is filled with  the sweetest  fighting  children you've ever seen , with rushing from place to place, with a hubby that has a stressful job, and with an endless run of bad luck these days. Relaxation was much needed, but rarely achieved.Having said this, it should not surprise anyone to hear  that exactly fifteen minutes down the highway our  car just stops in the middle of the road and we  coast  to the shoulder. I pick up the phone to cancel the whole thing , but pause hopefully.  The  hubby pops the hood and looks  genuinely pleased.  Simply, a disconnected battery wire. He reattaches  this  and  then my hero does his best to  flag down someone  to jump start our car. He waves the cables through the air as  cars fly by  and  to further my distaste  for  society - no one stops.  He continues to do this from the middle of the highway and finally my faith in humanity is restored. Out of the  70 cars that must have past us, one man stopped. As grateful as I am,  being from a less trusting area of the country I smile at the  man while my hand grasps the gun wedged between  the drivers seat and console waiting for him to attack us and steal my purse. Of course, this doesn't happen, but I like to be cautious. My husband  offers the man money and he refuses. Could good people actually be still hiding out there? Thank you wonderful stranger!
     On the road again, the tension starts to melt from my shoulders and the radio blasts out  every song I know in a row. Jackpot! The whole car full is singing everything from Reba  to Ozzy , except for the baby who graciously slept the entire way. Three hours later, the mountain air hits me and I can feel all of the  stress of life  slipping away and fantasy life beginning. We pull up to this  gorgeous three story cabin with huge windows that let in all the sunshine you could ask for and unpack the car.
      Welcome, to my life. The first night we are there begins so  beautifully.  We  unpack and play some games in the game room . the children are smiling as they bond with dad learning to shoot pool. I discover that I am one awesome foosball player, which until that day seemed like the most ridiculous waste of time I could imagine. (Yup, now I am hooked. ) I leave the boys downstairs to burn off their energy  while  dad and I  start to cook dinner. Cooking dinner with your husband  is such an amazing experience. I know , it sounds little and insignificant but it is the little things I have learned that make life so completely wonderful. Hubby  starts up the  grill and seasons the most wonderful steaks I have ever tasted while I crack open a bottle of Moscato and sip as I chop and create. (For those of you that don't know me- I am not a wine person...until now.) Sipping wine  while cooking and  eating with my family was definitely more  relaxing than say at home where  it would be... I dont want to eat at the table I want to eat  in my room/the living room/ the floor and Im not eating  that!!! My boys ATE their dinner. They ate steak. They have never touched a piece of meat before. Watching them tasting it and saying yummmmm was a treat for any mother. They tasted shrimp and well, atleast one like it. They cleaned their plates and  took them... and ours... to the sink. We pulled out  the  go fish cards and  played at the table. I distinctly remember the laughter and  the sweetness of this time. I can see myself  holding my wine glass to my chest and watching my husband and his sons  giggle over this game and thinking this is the most perfect picture of sweetness there ever was. And then it started...
      The kids  got into pj's and  we snuggle onto the couch. I get the text. One of my oldest friend writes, " Are you  guys ok?" I turn on the news. Tornadoes  surrounding  the town we are in on every side.  Storms everywhere. News reports of people dead and homes destroyed all around us and the wind picks up outside the ALL GLASS wall behind me. Great.  My bad luck has followed me.  It seems my car  was an omen to stay home. We let the kids sleep while I gather supplies and  head to the basement to prepare.  Then I wrapped up in a blanket with Daniel  on the couch to wait and see. We stayed up  til two in the morning. Let me rephrase. I stayed up til midnight watching the weather  and then  feeling the safety of Daniel's arms around me and the protective vibe as he  watched  the maps closely I  fell asleep on him. He stayed up til two until every storm had passed, again being my hero.  There were tornadoes and people killed  in every county surrounding us, but ours was kept completely safe.
      Despite the rough start, and that the baby doesn't sleep well anywhere but at home where he sleeps a solid twelve hours every night, we got up early and  started a wonderful day.Mostly , the same as the previous night, but with some hot tubbing  and  some  pizza from downtown . I am so relaxed at this point and  wondering if these mountains have magical powers. While the boys aren't at each other's throats and  Daniel has  the baby engrossed in Mickey Mouse, I  grab a towel and head outside on the deck. I shed my inhibitions  and my clothes for the first time since a random roadtrip to the nude beach with my girlfriends in New Jersey many years (and many many pounds) ago. I am high above the  roads  with no people for miles  on the top of a mountain with a view so clear I felt nestled in fluffy, white clouds. I spread my towel out and  let the sun pour down on me. The heat soothed my body and the  quiet eased my mind. As I lay there in this purest form of tranquility I realized that I was alone.. I haven't been alone in  eight years. I am free to read or think and to just be me. There is a sense of freedom and sensuality in stripping  down (physically and figuratively ) and just being alone with yourself in nature  and being perfectly at ease. This moment on my trip changed me back to the girl I was. I wanted to live life  instead of going through the motions. I wanted to make my dreams come to fruition. I wanted to be actively participating in my life and my kids life instead of waiting on the sidelines for something to happen.  That lasted an hour and a half, then dad informed me that my foosball championship title was in danger and I was needed to defend it in the basement.Somehow, that tired , rundown mom I was when I got there was gone and  I was ready for the challenge.
   On to the next phase of this trip. The great outdoors awaited  Friday morning after we checked out of the cabins. First a walk through town while waiting  for the Scenic Blue Ridge train ride  to begin. We had breakfast at a cute little outdoor dining spot and the boys loved it. I read  real estate pamphlets and sipped my tea.  Could I see myself living here? Absolutely. Do I have the money to move? Nope. Onward. Immediately after breakfast,  my kids want snowcones... what the heck it is vacation! By the time the train arrived the kids  were practically Smurfs with blue lips , tongues and  cheeks but we board and enjoy the views.  Enter Mandy's bad luck. The train stops abruptly and the conductors voice booms over the speaker. It appears that since the storms the train hasn't ran and no, no one had thought to check the tracks, so after  they get out a chainsaw and chop down the tree that had fallen across the path we were on we would be on our way. In the meantime, they take our picture. This doesn't seem significant on my road to self discovery, but just wait... It comes back to haunt and change me later.  After we arrive at our destination, I think back to a movie that stirs emotions in me every time I watch it and just have to do something. Picture Mandy Moore in A Walk To Remember.  She wanted to  be in two places at once. Well, I immediately take the  boys to the  State line of Georgia and Tennessee and  straddle it. We take pictures of our feet and giggle.  Now my children have been in two places at once and they can cross that off there bucket list as something they did with mom. We explored the area and  between lunch , toy shopping, and taking  millions of pictures passed the day until the train boarded again. Then it happens...
     "Woould you like to buy your family portrait from the beginning of the trip?" a sugary sweet , young girl says to me with a grin. I nod and ofcourse say yes.  She hands me the photo. Now, Ive been taking photos the whole trip , but there have not been many taken of me. I stare down at these  people.  A sexy, bald man  holding a cute  chubby baby that looks just like him, a tall , thin  boy with a silly grin , and a shorter boy with big dimples. Then I saw this woman. She was a stranger,  most certainly not me. This woman  was fat. Now, I don't mean fat like  when I was  a size six and  weighed 118lbs and thought I was fat. I mean an extremely overweight  person who was smiling and loved her life and that beautiful family she was there with, but  was definitely not happy or healthy in this  body . What had happened to me?
     Let me not allow you to think I am bonkers and didn't notice that I had gained weight. I knew I did.  After my oldest, I never fit into those size six jeans again. After my second son,  I fit into those jeans again, but they were by no means a size six. And now, eight months after the birth of my third and final baby, those jeans that I was not pleased  to be wearing in the first place are also  too tight. What a mess. I cried. I was depressed and all that  relaxation was shot. This had to change. The ride home, I was silent. No singing, minimal laughing and words eluded me. I had four  hours of reflection on that ride.
      There are so many  ways this   short trip changed me. First, the elusive  do-gooder on the way to the mountains who restore my faith,being spared from those storms that stole so many lives, followed by recapturing my sense of self on that deck in the sky,  seeing the joy in my children whether at home or on vacation and being active and playing with them more . Finally, and maybe the most important of all.  The view  from this  heaven  was wonderful, but I am in no way ready for heaven yet. I need to take better care of myself inside and out. I have too much to live for here on earth to let my life slip away. So now, the real journey begins...

No comments:

Post a Comment